What No One Ever Tells You About Being A Coloratura

It all started in middle school. I had begun to train my voice in earnest, and I started reading every book and article about singing that I could get my hands on. In my reading I came across the term "coloratura soprano."

Well, what on earth is that?

So I looked it up, and determined that there were three (and ONLY three, mind you) types of sopranos: lyric, dramatic, and coloratura. How exciting! And here I'd thought there were only altos and sopranos. My thirteen-year-old mind decided that lyric sopranos, being the most common type, were kind of like the bronze medalists of the bunch. Dramatic sopranos are rarer, and I liked a good loud noise now and then, but  after some trial and error I decided that I was not one. That left only one option: I must be a coloratura. They're the highest voice type, so they must be the best. Everyone wants to be the best. And that settled it; I was a coloratura, world without end, amen.

Whether due to God's sense of humor or to some glimmer of insight granted to my young brain, I turned out to be right. I am a coloratura.

... so, I'm the best. Right?

Maybe not.

What I missed at thirteen was this: an unusual voice is a double-edged sword, and being a coloratura does not make you a musical superhero. I have some unusual (though hardly as rare as I once proudly thought) strengths, but they are accompanied by unusual weaknesses and annoying glitches. So, since I am far better at making lists than writing actual articles, here are 5 things I wish I had known earlier about being a coloratura:


1. All the natural flexibility in the world cannot make up for a lack of technique.

2. Yes, even YOU will hurt yourself if you sing too high for too long.

3. Eventually, you will have to work on your middle range. And it will be a major pain in the butt, and take you three times longer than it should take any reasonable human being.

4. People will tell you that you can't sing the things you want to sing, because your voice isn't big enough. And they will be right.

5. It's really hard to sound sexy when you're coloratura-ing.


.... the end.