BWAAAAAAAAH! It's been a veritable eternity since I've updated my blog. Oh, my goodness. I don't know what got into me. I apologize to all my thousands of faithful readers who have been waiting with bated breath these last six months (<--- silliness).
Life update: I'm getting married in 11 days, which is kind of weird and amazing and awesome. Also, Mike and I have a dog! His name is William, and he is a small black chihuahua mix with crooked ears. He moans and whines when he gets sleepy. It's hilarious.
... I kind of wish I'd blogged my last job, which was summer daycare - kids are hilarious. I'll have remember to post some of the more ridiculous things that happened.
Oh! And also, I have fibromyalgia. Which really sucks, but it could be so much worse. Fortunately, it looks like my best bet for pain management is living a healthy, active life. So, yeah. That's about it, I guess.
Yep.
Monday, July 25, 2011
Monday, February 21, 2011
midget
When I was in grade school, I was always the shortest one in my class. My nickname, in fact, was "Midget." Naturally, I resented this. But now, though at 5'7" I'm not exactly a giant, I kind of wish I could go back a few inches.
Coffee, as it turns out, does not stunt your growth.
If I had missed 3 of those inches, keeping my current proportions, I would probably be able to fit into my mother's wedding dress without having panels put in. (Probably.) Also, I would be 6 luxurious inches shorter than Mike, and I would be a lot more believable as an ingenue onstage. Plus, my voice would finally match the way I look. People might even, at a stretch, use the words "petite" or "little" to describe me.
Someone needs to invent a shrink-ray.
Coffee, as it turns out, does not stunt your growth.
If I had missed 3 of those inches, keeping my current proportions, I would probably be able to fit into my mother's wedding dress without having panels put in. (Probably.) Also, I would be 6 luxurious inches shorter than Mike, and I would be a lot more believable as an ingenue onstage. Plus, my voice would finally match the way I look. People might even, at a stretch, use the words "petite" or "little" to describe me.
Someone needs to invent a shrink-ray.
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
understudy
Like the rest of America, my New Year's resolution was to lose weight.
This was a bit of a misrepresentation; I don't give a rip what I actually WEIGH. I just want to be healthy again, now that I have time to do more than study until my brains ooze out my ears (that actually happened to me once). I like feeling good, and being sedentary does not feel good.
... what I'm working my way around to saying is this: if you crave Cheetos, a good low-fat substitute is Quakes (you find them in the oatmeal aisle). They come in lots of flavors, my favorites being cheddar cheese and ranch. I think they're AMAZING. I like them better than most junk food, quite honestly.
Plus, they don't taste like grease and heart failure.
This was a bit of a misrepresentation; I don't give a rip what I actually WEIGH. I just want to be healthy again, now that I have time to do more than study until my brains ooze out my ears (that actually happened to me once). I like feeling good, and being sedentary does not feel good.
... what I'm working my way around to saying is this: if you crave Cheetos, a good low-fat substitute is Quakes (you find them in the oatmeal aisle). They come in lots of flavors, my favorites being cheddar cheese and ranch. I think they're AMAZING. I like them better than most junk food, quite honestly.
Plus, they don't taste like grease and heart failure.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
the sweatshirt didn't give it away?
Today has been a total train wreck. I attribute a large part of this to the fact that I dreamed I lost my dog Sammy last night. I lost him downtown, because there was another dog following me that LOOKED like Sammy, but I should have noticed because the other dog had a bobbed tail. And when I realized what had happened, I couldn't find Sammy. Clearly, this makes me a bad pet owner.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
the scent of a woman
When I was little, one of my greatest ambitions was to be old enough to wear perfume. Sometimes my mom would let me wear a little of hers on special occasions. On these glorious days, I usually got to wear Charlie Sunshine. Sometimes I would get to wear Emeraud; once or twice I was especially lucky, and mom let me have just a little dab of Cinnabar.
Perfume was the most magical thing in the world to me; it represented all things feminine and lovely and grown-up. To a certain extent, it still does.
This is part of why I really hated Rush Week in college.
I'm not saying that there's anything intrinsically wrong with sororities (I was in a women's fraternity, myself - no, I don't know what the difference is). But if they have any kind of formal gathering, RUN.
Seriously.
One minute, you're walking along the sidewalk, minding your own business, and the next minute - POOF! - you are completely engulfed in a fog of perfume: a sure sign that a large group of sorority girls passed by the same spot 45 minutes ago. This life-choking smog usually consists of three kinds of scent.
First, you have the foodies; you wouldn't think they would be that bad, but Sun-Ripened Raspberry, Warm Vanilla Sugar, and Sensual Amber just shouldn't mix. If you're having trouble with rioting peasants, take note - this formula makes for some truly first-rate tear gas. Personally, I don't know why some girls insist on smelling edible - who wants to date someone who always smells like a cookie? I don't know. But maybe it's just me.
Next, you have the trendies; Juicy Couture, L.A.M.B., and JLo Glow abound. I have nothing against any of these perfumes individually. I like Glow quite a lot, actually. But by this time, your olfactory nerves are already screaming for relief from the foodies - the trendies only serve to aggravate the problem.
Finally, you have the spendies. I won't give examples here - I don't want to be sued by a high-end label. Suffice it to say that these are the expensive ones. These are perhaps the most deadly of the trifecta - really good quality perfumes have a higher scent-to-alcohol ratio than their eau de parfum counterparts, which means they can last up to 8 hours on the wearer. I am convinced that the spendies, though individually much nicer than the others, are the real problem here. Scientific analysis proves that these perfumes attract other perfumes, thereby forming the noxious Sorority Scent Stratocumulus cloud.
This rare cloud formation is not exclusive to sorority gatherings - it can sometimes form in offices, and has been sighted frequently at nightclubs. Perhaps most disturbing is its tendency toward forming at church choir rehearsals.
The really sad part? These scents are usually worn in an effort to attract males - unfortunately, by the time the unsuspecting male has gotten within 10 yards of the wearer, he is overtaken with Sorority Scent Stratocumulus Syndrome, which is nearly always fatal. Disappointed and confused, the female will continue to seek out victims until she has killed every male in her immediate vicinity.
See? It's serious stuff.
Run, men, run. Run while your legs will still carry you.
Perfume was the most magical thing in the world to me; it represented all things feminine and lovely and grown-up. To a certain extent, it still does.
This is part of why I really hated Rush Week in college.
I'm not saying that there's anything intrinsically wrong with sororities (I was in a women's fraternity, myself - no, I don't know what the difference is). But if they have any kind of formal gathering, RUN.
Seriously.
One minute, you're walking along the sidewalk, minding your own business, and the next minute - POOF! - you are completely engulfed in a fog of perfume: a sure sign that a large group of sorority girls passed by the same spot 45 minutes ago. This life-choking smog usually consists of three kinds of scent.
First, you have the foodies; you wouldn't think they would be that bad, but Sun-Ripened Raspberry, Warm Vanilla Sugar, and Sensual Amber just shouldn't mix. If you're having trouble with rioting peasants, take note - this formula makes for some truly first-rate tear gas. Personally, I don't know why some girls insist on smelling edible - who wants to date someone who always smells like a cookie? I don't know. But maybe it's just me.
Next, you have the trendies; Juicy Couture, L.A.M.B., and JLo Glow abound. I have nothing against any of these perfumes individually. I like Glow quite a lot, actually. But by this time, your olfactory nerves are already screaming for relief from the foodies - the trendies only serve to aggravate the problem.
Finally, you have the spendies. I won't give examples here - I don't want to be sued by a high-end label. Suffice it to say that these are the expensive ones. These are perhaps the most deadly of the trifecta - really good quality perfumes have a higher scent-to-alcohol ratio than their eau de parfum counterparts, which means they can last up to 8 hours on the wearer. I am convinced that the spendies, though individually much nicer than the others, are the real problem here. Scientific analysis proves that these perfumes attract other perfumes, thereby forming the noxious Sorority Scent Stratocumulus cloud.
This rare cloud formation is not exclusive to sorority gatherings - it can sometimes form in offices, and has been sighted frequently at nightclubs. Perhaps most disturbing is its tendency toward forming at church choir rehearsals.
The really sad part? These scents are usually worn in an effort to attract males - unfortunately, by the time the unsuspecting male has gotten within 10 yards of the wearer, he is overtaken with Sorority Scent Stratocumulus Syndrome, which is nearly always fatal. Disappointed and confused, the female will continue to seek out victims until she has killed every male in her immediate vicinity.
See? It's serious stuff.
Run, men, run. Run while your legs will still carry you.
Monday, January 31, 2011
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HOLY COW! I'm getting married in 6 months and 5 days!
Please hurry, August.
Please hurry, August.
forgiveness is not an option
I seem to have developed the habit of writing mini-sermons.
Whoever you are, blog reader - you've been wronged. You've been unjustly accused, you've had things taken away from you, and people have said mean things behind your back and to your face. There's a good chance someone has abandoned you at one point or another; there's a disturbingly high likelihood that you've been abused. Bad things have happened to you for no reason.
Do you recognize your life in that list? I do. And I remember every person responsible for every one of those injustices. It's the "Naughty List" in the back of my mind - the names and faces of the people who have hurt me, who have hurt my family. I don't want to forgive them; they don't deserve forgiveness.
This is the part where most people say that you must forgive for your own sake - bitterness only hurts the heart that harbors it. And that's very true; if you don't forgive, hate can consume you from the inside out and make you into someone you don't even recognize. I'm certainly not going to try to debunk that principle - it's very sound. I would, however, like to point out a frequently-overlooked truth: Christians don't have a choice.
Oh, dear, I've upset the anti-Calvinists.
Here's the thing; if you believe that the Bible is the inerrant word of God, I'm pretty sure you can't wiggle your way out of this one, because....
Conclusion: We are commanded to forgive each other. Period. No backsies. No matter what.
It's natural to withhold forgiveness from those who do not deserve it. But we are called to be molded to the nature of Christ, which is supernatural. I don't like forgiving people very much, and I'm not very good at it. I keep having to forgive the same people for the same things; in fact, I'm pretty sure that in a couple of cases I'm pretty close to the 490 mark. But God's forgiveness has no limit, and neither should ours.
Whoever you are, blog reader - you've been wronged. You've been unjustly accused, you've had things taken away from you, and people have said mean things behind your back and to your face. There's a good chance someone has abandoned you at one point or another; there's a disturbingly high likelihood that you've been abused. Bad things have happened to you for no reason.
Do you recognize your life in that list? I do. And I remember every person responsible for every one of those injustices. It's the "Naughty List" in the back of my mind - the names and faces of the people who have hurt me, who have hurt my family. I don't want to forgive them; they don't deserve forgiveness.
This is the part where most people say that you must forgive for your own sake - bitterness only hurts the heart that harbors it. And that's very true; if you don't forgive, hate can consume you from the inside out and make you into someone you don't even recognize. I'm certainly not going to try to debunk that principle - it's very sound. I would, however, like to point out a frequently-overlooked truth: Christians don't have a choice.
Oh, dear, I've upset the anti-Calvinists.
Here's the thing; if you believe that the Bible is the inerrant word of God, I'm pretty sure you can't wiggle your way out of this one, because....
- Firstly: we are commanded to love the Lord our God with all our hearts, souls, and minds (Matthew 22.37).
- Secondly: Jesus says that, if we love Him, we are to keep his commandments (John 14:14-16).
- Thirdly: we are commanded to forgive as Christ has forgiven us (Colossians 3:13).
- Fourthly: How has Christ forgiven us? Psalm 103:12 says that God has removed our transgressions as far from us as the East is from the West; since the earth is round, neither direction has a stopping point. God has forgiven us infinitely and unconditionally.
- Fifthly: Oh, yeah, there's that little verse where Jesus says "judge not, and you shall not be judged" (Luke 6:37). I'm pretty sure He meant it.
Conclusion: We are commanded to forgive each other. Period. No backsies. No matter what.
It's natural to withhold forgiveness from those who do not deserve it. But we are called to be molded to the nature of Christ, which is supernatural. I don't like forgiving people very much, and I'm not very good at it. I keep having to forgive the same people for the same things; in fact, I'm pretty sure that in a couple of cases I'm pretty close to the 490 mark. But God's forgiveness has no limit, and neither should ours.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
drumroll, please....
I'm a blonde again!!!!!
... yes, yes, I know. You're all saying I've always been a blonde. Ha ha ha.
It's nice to be back. I've been varying shades of brown and red over the last 2.5 (or is it 3 by now?) years, because I can dye my own hair, and it costs considerably less. But I'm not dumb enough to experiment with bleach.
But now I have a job! YAAAY! So I ditched the dye kits - I had been getting SO tired of being a redhead - and went blonde again.
It's good to be back.
... yes, yes, I know. You're all saying I've always been a blonde. Ha ha ha.
It's nice to be back. I've been varying shades of brown and red over the last 2.5 (or is it 3 by now?) years, because I can dye my own hair, and it costs considerably less. But I'm not dumb enough to experiment with bleach.
But now I have a job! YAAAY! So I ditched the dye kits - I had been getting SO tired of being a redhead - and went blonde again.
It's good to be back.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
slow day
I hate slow days at work.
(I just heard the rest of America say "Pffffft! I wish I had some slow days at work!")
It seems like a dumb thing to complain about - after all, I'm still getting paid. That's right; I'm getting paid to answer the phone on the off-chance it should ring, design myself some business cards, and write inane blog posts. Here's the catch: I have to look busy.
I mean, really. All I want to do is take a nap, but when you work in a little glass box, people notice if you're not awake and in an upright position. People also notice if you work on your braided rug - personally, I think crafting is a far more profitable use of my time than goofing off on the computer, but then people would walk by and think "what am I paying HER for?"
Man, am I in a whiny mood today. Must fix.
TEN GOOD THINGS ABOUT TODAY
1. I remembered to pack my lunch.
2. I have a Hello Kitty lunchbox.
3. I designed some distinctly attractive business cards.
4. I might get to stay up late - work will open late tomorrow if it snows.
5. I get to go to the gym after work.
6. I have an amazing fiancé.
7. Jordie Bee taught me how to type an accent over the E in fiancé.
8. Work is almost over.
9. Daddy gave me a bunch of quarters.
10. I have pretty shoes.
(I just heard the rest of America say "Pffffft! I wish I had some slow days at work!")
It seems like a dumb thing to complain about - after all, I'm still getting paid. That's right; I'm getting paid to answer the phone on the off-chance it should ring, design myself some business cards, and write inane blog posts. Here's the catch: I have to look busy.
I mean, really. All I want to do is take a nap, but when you work in a little glass box, people notice if you're not awake and in an upright position. People also notice if you work on your braided rug - personally, I think crafting is a far more profitable use of my time than goofing off on the computer, but then people would walk by and think "what am I paying HER for?"
Man, am I in a whiny mood today. Must fix.
TEN GOOD THINGS ABOUT TODAY
1. I remembered to pack my lunch.
2. I have a Hello Kitty lunchbox.
3. I designed some distinctly attractive business cards.
4. I might get to stay up late - work will open late tomorrow if it snows.
5. I get to go to the gym after work.
6. I have an amazing fiancé.
7. Jordie Bee taught me how to type an accent over the E in fiancé.
8. Work is almost over.
9. Daddy gave me a bunch of quarters.
10. I have pretty shoes.
peace, love, and... wait a minute.
After having been together almost a year, you'd think that Mike and I would have had a few fights by now. Or, if not fights, at least some arguments here and there. That's normal, right? But we haven't. We've had a few very calm disagreements, and we've been upset with one another, and one of us is prone to occasional hysteria (*cough*it'sme*cough*), but we have yet to fight. We haven't even raised our voices.
Which is great. I get really upset when people are angry with me, and loud voices hurt my feelings.
... no, it's great. Seriously.
It just makes me a little paranoid, like when the token blonde in a horror movie has a narrow escape - you know she's going to die an awful death eventually, and now you have to WAIT for it and it's all creepy.
Bad analogy. I'll try to explain myself a little more clearly.
I think what I'm trying to say is that it worries me a little bit that we haven't fought, because one of these days we ARE going to disagree on something major. And it's going to be a big deal. And we won't have a clue what to do or what to expect from each other.
Maybe I'm borrowing trouble; maybe that's just how we interact. Every relationship is different. But I feel a little bit like I'm swimming in shark territory with a sign on my butt that says "FREE FOOD." Something's bound to happen eventually.
Not that Mike is remotely shark-like. That's not what I meant.
... okay, now I'm just rambling. It's time for this post to be over.
Which is great. I get really upset when people are angry with me, and loud voices hurt my feelings.
... no, it's great. Seriously.
It just makes me a little paranoid, like when the token blonde in a horror movie has a narrow escape - you know she's going to die an awful death eventually, and now you have to WAIT for it and it's all creepy.
Bad analogy. I'll try to explain myself a little more clearly.
I think what I'm trying to say is that it worries me a little bit that we haven't fought, because one of these days we ARE going to disagree on something major. And it's going to be a big deal. And we won't have a clue what to do or what to expect from each other.
Maybe I'm borrowing trouble; maybe that's just how we interact. Every relationship is different. But I feel a little bit like I'm swimming in shark territory with a sign on my butt that says "FREE FOOD." Something's bound to happen eventually.
Not that Mike is remotely shark-like. That's not what I meant.
... okay, now I'm just rambling. It's time for this post to be over.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
marriage advice from my mother
As marriage grows ever nearer, I have received more and more advice - both solicited and unsolicited - on how to have a successful marriage; some of it has been very good, and some of it has been... very interesting, but the best advice I've had was given to me by my mother. I don't remember exactly how she phrased it, but I'll do my best to capture the essence of what she told me.
When you reach the point where you know you're right, and that you can't possibly move forward unless your spouse changes their behaviour, you are the one who is going to have to change.
Not because the husband, as the head of the household, is always right - I'm sure Mike's going to make some dumb mistakes along the way, as will I (though I expect the majority of them will be mine... not because I am a woman, but because I am ME, and dumb mistakes happen to me a lot) - but because marriage is about sacrifice. Just as you must die to yourself daily to be molded to Christ's likeness, both husband and wife must die to themselves and love each other sacrificially to become one flesh before God.
Easy concept? No. That's why the traditional Anglican marriage service says marriage is to be entered into "soberly, and in the fear of God."
... anyway. That's my mini-sermon for the day.
When you reach the point where you know you're right, and that you can't possibly move forward unless your spouse changes their behaviour, you are the one who is going to have to change.
Not because the husband, as the head of the household, is always right - I'm sure Mike's going to make some dumb mistakes along the way, as will I (though I expect the majority of them will be mine... not because I am a woman, but because I am ME, and dumb mistakes happen to me a lot) - but because marriage is about sacrifice. Just as you must die to yourself daily to be molded to Christ's likeness, both husband and wife must die to themselves and love each other sacrificially to become one flesh before God.
Easy concept? No. That's why the traditional Anglican marriage service says marriage is to be entered into "soberly, and in the fear of God."
... anyway. That's my mini-sermon for the day.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Update: January
Gracious! I promised to be more punctual with my posts, but I failed to take the holiday season into account. Anyway, it's mid-January now, so I guess I'll give you a little peek into my world.
Firstly, I have my own office. This is the most exciting part about my job - I've never had my own office before. So I've been working to make it cute (which hasn't been easy, let me tell you), tidying things up, organizing, and that sort of thing. I spend most of my time doing light paperwork and working with assorted databases and Microsoft Publisher.
Also, I joined a gym. I am DETERMINED to get back in shape. I don't care what size wedding dress I wear; I just need to get back what college took from me. Plus, I have asthma and a family history of heart problems... getting in shape is just a generally sound idea.
I've started planning my wedding - fortunately, Mike is basically the most amazing man ever and has no aversion to helping me plan. Part of this, I'm sure, is that we're keeping the wedding as simple as possible. I don't like fuss and fluff in a wedding.
Anyway. My lunch break is over. So I'll post more later.
Firstly, I have my own office. This is the most exciting part about my job - I've never had my own office before. So I've been working to make it cute (which hasn't been easy, let me tell you), tidying things up, organizing, and that sort of thing. I spend most of my time doing light paperwork and working with assorted databases and Microsoft Publisher.
Also, I joined a gym. I am DETERMINED to get back in shape. I don't care what size wedding dress I wear; I just need to get back what college took from me. Plus, I have asthma and a family history of heart problems... getting in shape is just a generally sound idea.
I've started planning my wedding - fortunately, Mike is basically the most amazing man ever and has no aversion to helping me plan. Part of this, I'm sure, is that we're keeping the wedding as simple as possible. I don't like fuss and fluff in a wedding.
Anyway. My lunch break is over. So I'll post more later.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)